reasons I can relate to a possum:
-tired & unkempt, smells weird
-emotions ranging from “displeased” to “existential scream”
-no work ethic
-lies around looking dead when overwhelmed
-will eat trash & live amongst trash if left to own devices
-sometimes you feel bad and feed it a sandwich
restaurant: sorry we stop serving at 8
me: honey i never stop serving
Why is the cake cutting-thingy square? And where’s the leftovers from the middle circle?
One of the pieces disappears?????
it’s a mouse wearing pants
when u drunk and alone in the bathroom and u hear a noise
I wanna live like this llama
Please unmute this.
This llama is thinking, “I’m a pretty pretty princess.”
WHAT A MAJESTIC CREATURE
Ludmila Pagliero rehearsing Bournonville’s La Sylphide at Mariinsky Theatre for The 22nd International Stars of the White Nights Festival
absolutely perfect pointework
Hey!! I'm currently interested in an Indian girl (who I think is interested in me too!) and I'm wondering if there are certain things that Indian women look for in a guy? Also, is there any hostility for Indian parents when their daughter dates a non-Indian man (in my case, white)? Thank you!
im so glad you came to me obviously i am a master at knowing all things indian women and i know everything about pleasing indian parents and since ur a white this will help tremendously because i am ur only reliable source so listen up
- indian parents looooove when you are super dominate towards them like right in the moment you step into the house (DONT REMOVE YOUR SHOES THO THIS IS CRUCIAL KEEP THEM ON) make sure you tell them straight up that you are the Boss!!! don’t show any courtesy or respect thats like a sign of weakness and shit
- us indian women are all from the same background and religion and all the unimportant stuff so what I’m trying to say is like kama sutra is like super important AND appropriate to discuss with ur lovers parents INFACT its rude not to explicitly list the details of you and your partners sex life so make ur you tell mom and pops all the juicy deets
- at the end of the beautiful arrangement tell them with ur white power that you own their daughter because we love dowry and history so thats great and that you want to move in with them as a family <-OBVIOUSLY you will be the new head of the clan if you follow these steps right
wow omg this advice is gold and you will do amazing at impressing your indian woman’s parents don’t worry u are white! colonizing all things indian naturally runs in ur veins Go Get Em Tiger!!!
You’re going to get this brother murdered.
Ludacris ft. Nate Dogg - Area Codes
yesterday while thinking about breakfast I sleepily said “do you want a little egg bagel sammy? A little Ed begley jr?” And now I will never not call it that I can’t stop thinking about it